Today I awoke at 5:30 am to the sweet sound of my wife's voice. When Mickie (for those of you that don't know, Mickie is my wife) works the day shift, half past five is her normal time to rise and shine. Since I have fallen ill, I usually don't even hear my wife go through her morning routine, but I do awake an hour or two later with the excited anticipation of what ever morning note I have next to the coffee pot. Today was different, I had to get up. Ok, I'll go ahead and say it, I'm not proud of it, and am still a bit embarrased by it, but I had to get up to take our only car so that I could go to our local food pantry. I love the early mornings with my wife. The fact that the world has yet to rev up it's motor for the day, along with the serenity that the pre dawn hours bring seems to set the mood for nice, tranquil conversation. I've always loved moments when the world seems to be at peace with itself, no matter what time that may be.
I dropped my wife off at 6:45 am, wished her a great day, and now had to find something to do until about 8:30 am, which is when the line at the food pantry seems to start growing in numbers. The pantry doesn't actually open until 9:30 am, but as I said, the line forms early. I had enough change in my pocket for a cup of coffee, so armed with a morning paper, I went to Burger King to pass as much time as possible without being considered a loiterer. I had done it, when I arrived at our local food pantry, the line was forming outside the building, it was 8:10 am. The food pantry is very strict about adhering to the time in which they unlock their doors. They open their doors at 9:00 am, and the line for food starts at 9:30 am, like I had previously stated. One does their absolute best to stay warm until the doors open, a very small price to pay for the gratuitous service that the pantry provides.
Yes, going from making close to $100,000 per year between my wife and I, to having depend on a local food bank is a very big adjustment to make. At first, I was humiliated and embarrased, today I am humbled and grateful. The people that I have met at our local food pantry often share the same story as we do. Husband or wife falls ill, no health insurance, one salary does not cover all of the bills, some times have to do with out medications just to pay rent. Every one has a different set of circumstances, I thought nothing like this could ever happen to my family, I was wrong. The array of ethnicities at the food pantry leaves no one to spare. When you look real close at some of the people, despair and worry grips their faces, trying to keep children calm, or from crying because they are hungry only adds to that crack in my heart as I feel it breaking for them. It literally brings tears to my eye's and a complete feeling of hopelessness when I see some of these decent folk's having to ask for help. I still don't understand how we can spend billions on rebuilding Iraq, and have a child in Menasha, Wisconsin with out enough food to eat.
With a lot of time left in the day, I went and picked up my grandson Anthony, who eventually ended spending the night with us tonight. When I pick him up, I always make sure I have an extra dollar or two in my pocket so that I can take him to St. Vincent de Paul's thrift store and look for a toy or two that costs next to nothing. One would think that I have spent a million dollars with the excitement that Anthony gets from a one dollar toy. I love that little boy, he fills our home with not only energy, but a positive energy that I always miss when he goes back home.
Mickie landed herself a second job today, which doubles my feeling of guilt. She tells me I would do the same if she were sick, and I know that I would, but that doesn't make it any better. I wish I could lavish my wife with gifts galore, but I can't, but I want to. I'll always want to.That brings me to this moment, writing to you fine folks. I hope that I presented this is some what of an entertaining fashion, I will continue this on a daily basis, and I'll let every one know when I need a break. I will tell you this every day---I really do appreciate you reading my blog. Thank you. Love.
1 comment:
Another good post. Give Mickey HUGS for me too. The Valentines may be a lot of things but slackers ain't one of them. :)
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